... and the other half aren't so bright

I need to get out of the game.

It's been a while since my embrace, and the modern nights as a fledgeling has been harsh on me, but thanks to my sire and some benevolent elders, I've managed to avoid the final death. It's impossible to survive the nights alone - you either play the game, study the board and it's pieces, or you get sacrificed soon to protect the king. You need help, power and influence to survive, but the only help that I could get so far are from my sire, and a few others. My sire rescued me, and continues to consistently ground me if I'm in trouble. I'm grateful for all that and the Camarilla that took me in and gave me this unlife. I feel that the they really needs me, as I've proven my usefulness to them (4), and my sire insists and surely wishes that I stay behind and fight for her, so washing my hands and running away makes me feel guilty, and that running away isn't the right thing to do, especially now, when things are quite hard for them, but am I exaggerating it?

I used my boss' keycard to break into the Seneschal's room, and grabbed the ledger with details about the kindred population of Los Angeles, and prepared a small list based on how important they are, and how I feel about them from my interactions so far with them, or who they are as kindred.

It's just not worth it.